"Both Hands" By Ani Difranco

Counting Crows - Colorblind [Musicvideo]

Eminem - Not Afraid

Face Down lyrics - by the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

This video touches me on a very deep level. Girls, PLEASE know that you are worth more than this!!!

Philosophies on Life, Poetry, and Other Creative Writings: Girls, Don't Ever Let A Man Bring You Down!!!

Philosophies on Life, Poetry, and Other Creative Writings: Girls, Don't Ever Let A Man Bring You Down!!!: " Okay girls, young women, etc. This is a very serious subject that is close to my heart. Almost my entire adult life, I have de..."

Girls, Don't Ever Let A Man Bring You Down!!!

   Okay girls, young women, etc. This is a very serious subject that is close to my heart. Almost my entire adult life, I have depended on a man in some way or another. Even though I am college-educated and had a 3.75 G.P.A., I never earned a college degree. Except for maybe 3 months where I lived in Grand Junction, Colorado, I have always lived with, and been dependent upon a man.
   Girls, it is SO not worth it!!! When your finances and privileges depend on your "guy's" mere whim, you are helpless, a puppet in his marionette, a spider in the midst of his web, you are NEVER really free. Most of my life, I have been dependent upon a guy. It's not all peaches and cream...
   There is a sense of self-worth and an inner confidence that one acquires when one can prove to themselves that they have an inner strength.
   No female wants to be made to feel inferior, stupid, or less than adequate...like they never (no matter how hard they try), measure up. A woman's self-esteem is very fragile. We as females, so much more than males, need support and encouragement in our lives. It is essential to mental and emotional health.
   For you women whom think you have nowhere to turn, no escape route, no way out, no path to salvation, I am here to tell you that THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY OUT!!! There is always an easier, softer way. It may be more difficult and treacherous but morally it is just "right", and you will be able to sleep better late at night.
   YOUR SOUL IS THE ONE THING YOU CAN'T COMPROMISE!!!! Enough said!!!
   Now if you have a child, the emancipation of your soul is even more prudent. It is not just you whom you are living for. You now have dependents, who are completely dependent on you. It is your job now as a mother, to be a good example for these young souls. They look up to you, you are their greatest teacher in life, so you better set a darn good example for them!!!
   Abuse, and I mean ANY abuse, is completely unacceptable. Physical abuse should NEVER be tolerated!!!
However, verbal abuse is far worse, in my opinion. Verbal abuse hits one emotionally and psychologically in a way that physical abuse can't even vaguely touch.
   So girls, there IS help out there. There are shelters, there is government help ( as well as private) and grants out there... don't be afraid to ask for help or seek out redemption.
   You my young lady, are special, beautiful, and intelligent---DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YOU DIFFERENT!!! Believe in yourself first and those in turn will follow suit and believe in you. YOU DON'T NEED A MAN!!! You are fabulous being single! Plus it gives you time to really reconnect, really get to know yourself!!!
   Remember honey, you are a QUEEN, treat yourself as such....And don't let ANYONE tell you that you that you aren't beautiful...

David Gray - Shine

Seven Mary Three - Lucky '01

Eminem - Hailie's song

Philosophies on Life, Poetry, and Other Creative Writings: No Family For The Holidays???

Philosophies on Life, Poetry, and Other Creative Writings: No Family For The Holidays???: " The holiday season can be a difficult time for many people. Suicide rates tend to go up and there is an increased amount of st..."

No Family For The Holidays???

   The holiday season can be a difficult time for many people. Suicide rates tend to go up and there is an increased amount of stress amongst most. Besides all  the hustle and bustle of holiday shopping, the deadline on getting Christmas cards sent out, and the dilemma of what to cook for Christmas dinner, there is an even increased amount of stress and depression for those who don't have any family.
   For some of us, our family is literally deceased, but for many of us, we are just estranged from our family for some reason or another. At a time of the year where family values and togetherness are really important and valued, it can leave many of us feeling empty and alone.
   Now I do have a saying that I hold deep to my heart that has aided me very well in my own life, and that is that when we are children, we are born into a family. We didn't ask for the people that we got or the hands that we were dealt, but nonetheless this is what we got. When we come of age and are an adult ourselves, we have the choice to "create" our own family. And by family, I mean the people who we chose to surround ourselves with, who we are close to and who love and support us like a family should.
   I am speaking as someone who has never been close with my family at all. Ever. With both of my parent's working in the mental health profession, their focus was mainly on their jobs, their "caseloads" more important than their own daughter and their attention focused on how to make even more money and ultimately achieve a higher "status". I always wished that I could wave a magic wand in front of their face showing them that these things are not really what is important in life.
   I can't think of anything that is more important than love and loving family and friends. Even though it is rare that I will ever receive a card or a phone call from them, I consistently reach out to them I refuse to stoop down to their level of non-acknowledgement. I will continue to reach out until the day that I die. Why you may ask? Just because it is THE RIGHT THING TO DO.
   Now that I have a young son, I have my own little family. Plus all of the other good people in my life whom I do consider to be "family" to me as well. The holidays can be tough, but really just like anything else, it is what you choose to make of it!!! Things can only bring you down if you let them. I choose happiness over despair, fulfillment over emptiness, joy over loneliness...
   So for those of us who don't have any or many "true" family, remember that you can always create your own and we all have the ability to have a wonderful holiday season!!!! HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

Philosophies on Life, Poetry, and Other Creative Writings: The Battle To Stay Sober...

Philosophies on Life, Poetry, and Other Creative Writings: The Battle To Stay Sober...: " I have had three close friends die on me within the last year.All three of their deaths were either directly or indirectly a result of ..."

The Battle To Stay Sober...

     I have had three close friends die on me within the last year. All three of their deaths were either directly or indirectly a result of drugs. Having a chemical dependence is just not worth all of the pain and losses that it causes.It hurts the people who love us, and more importantly, it hurts us and destroys our lives and our bodies.  
    Why do people use drugs and alcohol? Usually because there is something missing in their lives. There is a hole deep inside themselves that needs to be filled. Drugs and alcohol temporarily fill this void and makes them feel whole.
     But the void is still there when the chemicals wear off, and we are still empty. What we need to do is find that peace inside ourselves, not look for it outside ourselves. It is the same with people who turn to money to bring them joy. Or botox and liposuction for that matter. These things are just a temporary fix. The joy that it brings is not true joy. It is just an illusion.
    We need to learn to love ourselves, appreciate what we do have instead of wallowing in what we don't have. If we truly love ourselves, we won't want to hurt our bodies with chemicals. Drugs destroy our brain cells, our heart, our muscle tissue, our liver, and so on. our body is our temple. It is the shell that we were given to exist in this lifetime. Lets appreciate it and treat it with respect.
   I know that life can be hard. We have to endure pain and losses. There are many uphill battles that we have to face. But there is also much joy. To look into our child's eyes and see that purity and innocence, to marvel at a beautiful sunrise, to lay on the beach and feel the sand between our toes, to have that special feeling of warmth with our family during the holidays... the list goes on.
  On a different note, I have to reflect on the situation with my son. Because of my alcohol and prescription drug abuse, I do not have custody of my son. right now. The state has custody and he is residing with friends of mine The goal is still reunification with me, I visit with him a few times a week, and I am subject to random and scheduled drug tests. I HAVE to get my son back. This period of my life is the most important time that I have ever dealt with. This is a turning point, All eyes are on me. No matter what, I cannot turn to drugs or alcohol to relieve my anxiety or cover up my pain.
   Sooner or later we have to realize that chemicals are not the answer.The answer lies within us. We hold the key that opens up the door inside our souls.We have the power to free our minds, let go of our insecurities, fears, and distorted perceptions. We can't live or whole lives masking our problems and numbing ourselves. There is just too much to lose if we chose this path. Please, if you or someone you know is afflicted with addiction, GET HELP!!! There is help out there. There is so much more to life that we can experience. When we are numbing ourselves with chemicals, we are not really living!!! I am speaking from experience. Sobriety is the only way to live. staying sober can be a battle, but it is truly worth it in the end...

Soldiers In The Name Of Love...

We are all just balls of energy, floating around, bouncing off each other. We feed off of each other. Every human soul is so complex. We feel so many more emotions than just animals. We can come to analyzations about things, attain enlightenments of sorts... We as humans are beautiful creatures. In our truest form, we are pure LOVE. Of course in this world that we live in, we encounter a lot of hatred, materialism, and greed. We are born innocent though, completely pure, new, with wide open eyes. We begin to build up walls to protect ourselves from pain. Environmental circumstances can turn an innocent child into someone who posesses hate. That is so very sad. Deep down inside, everyone just wants to be loved and accepted. People want to be able to give love freely and "shine" out their own energy without the fear of judgement. If we only put out good energy into the world, the world would be a perfect, loving place. Where did we go wrong? War. What an ugly word. But it seems like us humans are always in some form of a war. Usually, it all comes down to money and greed. But I am confident that in our truest forms, we are pure love. So what can we do about the negative energy in this world? All I can say is keep giving out LOVE. Teach love and acceptance to your children, be a compassionate and empathetic human being. And since all we are is balls of energy bouncing off of each other, consider it like the domino effect. If you walk down the street and say "hi" and smile at a person, make them feel your love, they will most likely smile and say "hi" to the next person they pass on the street. We are soldiers in the name of LOVE. We need to fight the negativity every day. Pure love will win every time. NOTHING CAN FIGHT PURE LOVE. If we can remember this, we will be okay.If someone comes at us with hatred and negativity, just always come back at them with love. We need to remember that we are all connected. We are all just energy. We are all brothers and sisters of the human race. We are all ONE. We can win this war. Stand tall. Stand proud. We are true no-limit soldiers. Soldiers in the name of love.

Dying To Be Thin

I feel compelled to write about the subject of eating disorders for a couple of reasons. First and foremost, is because so many young girls and women are bombarded with images from the media every day telling them that they are just not thin enough, don't have big enough boobs, don't have a perfect face, and so on. More than it making me sick, it mostly makes me so sad. The other reason that I am writing about this is because I too struggle with an eating disorder and have since I was about twelve years old. Now I am not saying that the media is the only one to blame. Many children and even adults make fun of females for being "fat". Many times it's some kids in a girls class at school. Even sadder though, is when it's a girls own mother or father, aunt or uncle, brother or sister, etc. Any what really makes me angry about this is that the majority of this country's population is clinically obese!!! With many young women though, it is an issue of control, having complete control of this aspect of their lives possibly when everything else in their lives is a mess. And yes, people can be overly controlling of many different things. They can be exercise nuts, clean freaks, overly controlling of another person in a relationship, etc. There are many roads that one can take if they feel a loss of control in their lives, but when women (and yes, some men) choose an eating disorder, it's 99% likely that it was introduced to them at some time in their lives. Somehow they learned that this is something that they can do, from reading about it, seeing it on t.v., one of their classmates in school, etc. In other countries, this is not an issue, not even an idea! Third-world countries where a girl would die to just have a loaf of bread for her and her family to share, not be literally, purposefully, dying to be thin. If we look at the bigger picture like that, the whole idea of starving oneself  or binging and purging (throwing up) seems so ridiculous and petty. Nourishment is something that all living things must have to survive. If animals don't eat, they will eventually die. Their bodies will begin to eat themselves. And yes, we may be more evolved and complex, but we are still animals. Eating disorders can be so hard to kick, especially if it has been hardwired into someones brain at such an early age. It can be all someone knows to do to give themselves comfort, a sense of satisfaction or accomplishment. It could also be a form of one's own punishment to themselves for not meeting up to their own or someone else's high expectations. Being an anorexic or bulimic is just like being an alcoholic. One may not be a practicing alcoholic anymore, but it's still there. It is still something that one has to manage every day. The thought may cross one's mind to vomit up what they just ate, but one must tell themselves "NO!!! This is not a healthy thing to do, and I LOVE MYSELF way too much to hurt myself". And really what this all comes down to is a lack of self-love and self-respect. We need to be able to look in the mirror and be able to say "I am a human being, I am beautiful, and I love myself." Please, I know it's hard, but don't worry about what others think and say if it is negative and brings you down!!! This is the body that you were given for this lifetime. For an entire lifetime, you are stuck with yourself and yourself only. There is no guarantee that someone else will always love you and be there for you, so you have to LOVE YOURSELF. Truly loving one's self is one of the hardest things to do. For most everyone, it is a lifelong journey. Living with an eating disorder is not a way to live. It is so time consuming and detrimental. We could be doing so many more productive things with our time, like HELPING someone else instead of HURTING ourselves. Please, if you or anyone that you know have an eating disorder, try to get them some form of help. The problem doesn't go away on one's own. And please, tell them that you love them and that true beauty is on the inside...

Philosophies on Life, Poetry, and Other Creative Writings: Thinking and Feeling

Philosophies on Life, Poetry, and Other Creative Writings: Thinking and Feeling: "To think is of the mind. To feel is of the soul. The mind is only part of the physical body. It is actually our SIXTH sense, just like ou..."

Philosophies on Life, Poetry, and Other Creative Writings: The Sweetest Simplest Life

Philosophies on Life, Poetry, and Other Creative Writings: The Sweetest Simplest Life: "I'd like to talk about the 'good life'. What I think of as the 'good life' and what others think may very well be two different things. Most..."

The Sweetest Simplest Life

I'd like to talk about the "good life". What I think of as the "good life" and what others think may very well be two different things. Most people are constantly working towards gaining more money and possessions, a higher status, more degrees, more fame, etc. In my opinion, this type of living is just a huge waste of time. I'm not saying be dirt-poor and without an education, I'm just saying remember what's really important. Don't get swept away with the 9-5 rat race and "keeping up with the Jones'". Don't spend most of your day sitting in front of a television, computer, or video game. Remember the outdoors? Nature? Where we came from in the first place. We came from the earth. Families used to play games and eat dinner together. Most of the time on our drives to and from work or the market we don't even appreciate the beautiful sky or mountain ranges. We spend our lives existing on automatic "robotic" mode. Peel back the film off your eyes so you can truly see! We need to enjoy every moment--every color, sound, touch, smell, taste,etc. Play with your children, tell them you love them. Spend time just holding your lover, tell them you love them, actually listen to what they have to say. Take time out of your hectic schedule to meditate, go for a nature walk, enjoy the sunset... These material things, this monetary gain that we are never satisfied with---we are not going to take these things with us when we die. But we are going to take our souls with us. So lets try to work on becoming better people--more compassionate, empathetic, humble, innocent, giving, and appreciative. Days turn into months turn into years and then we look back and wonder where all that time went, we were too busy and oblivious to really experience it. We have been given this gift of life! Treat it as such. Don't just live, truly be ALIVE!!! Take joy in the simple things, every minute of every day, then you can look back with a feeling of fulfillment in knowing you lived the sweetest, simplest life...

Thinking and Feeling

To think is of the mind. To feel is of the soul. The mind is only part of the physical body. It is actually our SIXTH sense, just like our eyes, our ears, our sense of smell, and touch. These are our TOOLS in this lifetime, the tools that have been given to us to come to realizations, to analyze, come to conclusions, determinations, epiphanies and awareness about life. Through our experiences, we use different "tools" to grow, learn, and evolve...