Saturday, February 11, 2012

Why Wicca Is My Way

   The choice to follow the path of spiritual enlightenment through Wicca was entirely my own. Wicca is a natural and practical aspect of my being. It meshes easily with the cycles of the universe. More importantly, it meshes well with me and the many facets of my personality.


   Far from the common belief of Satanists, practices of black magic, or worshippers of evil, Wiccans are a benign people who are closely attuned to nature. Their first and only commandment is to harm none. It is a celebration of the moon phases and of the seasons, the positive male aspects and the negative female aspects of nature, the Goddess and the God. This is a religion closely aligned with the sun and the moon, the oceans and the forests, the mountains and the shores. As children of the Goddess and the God, we are all equal. We all play intricate roles in the universal scheme of things.

   Instead of the ten commandments to guide us through life, we have only one: " An it harm none, do what thou wilt". This ever reminds us to be aware that every action that we take, every word we say and every thought that we think into fruition-- is similar to ripples in a pond. For every action there is a reaction. Wicca is an Earth religion, much like the Native American religion. Instead of worshipping within the confines of a building, we often hold our rituals outdoors in nature. We don't believe in Hell, the Devil, or "fire and brimstone". We do believe that evil exists in the world, but that humankind creates it's own evil and that such horrors are handled through the laws of "karma" and the lessons that reincarnation brings. We believe in the Threefold Law, meaning that everything you do, good or bad, comes back to you times three.


   I am a Solitary Wiccan. I don't belong to a coven, I practice alone. It is very rare that I find someone who shares my affinity for Wicca. Thus, I am very reclusive when it comes to my spiritual practices. I have my own portable altar which allows me to practice anywhere, anytime. I call upon the north, south, east and west. I call upon the elements of earth, air, fire, water and spirit. I call upon the Goddess and God and thank them for my many blessings. I practice when I am alone and feeling at peace with myself and one with the universe. Practicing the Craft helps keep me grounded and centered.


   In conclusion, Wicca is a religion of compassion and utmost mindfulness. The craft is generous, accepting and loving. It is unobtrusive, supportive and gentle. It is an ethical way of life that, once embraced, brings immeasurable joy and wonder to my everyday living.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Welcome To Salvation

   Raindrops of redemption soak me to the core

   Let my fears wash away in the pool of my trangressions

   My life is a menagerie of colorful images

   The day filters through with it's illuminous illustrations

   I keep my eyes unprejudiced and my mind wide open

   Empathy is my remedy

   Let the angels of mercy come down--

   Let them wrap their wings of reconcilliation around me

   The clouds are finally clearing

   Peace of mind is setting in

   The worst is over now, I can live again

   I want to be weightless and free

   I'm swimming in a pool of possibilities

   I'm embraced with overtures of opportunity

   I marvel at the delicate dusk

   The magic, the splendor, the awe

   Please don't destroy my delicate daydream

   I'm returning to innocence

   My spirituality is strong, cannot be ruptured

   Welcome to salvation

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

I Don't Step On The Scale Anymore

   I have issues with my body image, no doubt about that. I have had issues for a long time, since I was about twelve years old. Stepping on the scale for me can be a very formidable thing. If the number that appears before me is higher than I want it to be, I will berate and belittle myself all day and possibly result to drastic measures to lose weight. And of course the number will always be a little higher than I want it to be. So why not spare myself the drama?


   I have been getting much better with managing my quasi body dysmorphia and disordered eating. Like being an alcoholic, I will always be an alcoholic even if I am not an active one. So I will always have an eating disorder even if it is inactive for the rest of my life. Anyways, I wake up and eat a very healthy breakfast every morning. I get on my eliptical and do at least four miles, for about an hour every day. I eat fruit for the rest of the day, if I'm hungry.(okay, maybe that's not normal but let's move on...). I also take vitamins, supplements, and amino acids every morning. I am learning to love and appreciate my body type. I am a mesomorph, a naturally muscular build. That has been very difficult for me to accept for a very long time. It's most assuredly a daily struggle, but the rewards are well worth it.


   Stepping on the scale to see how much I weigh seems pointless to me. I am then judging myself according to a number. If I feel healthy, am living a healthy lifestyle, and fit well in my clothes, then I must be doing something right. A number on a scale doesn't own me or represent who I am as a human being. Aside from scales and weight and body image, I am a pretty spectacular person. I'm very opportunistic about this phase of my spiritual development. Someday I will look back at these obstacles that I am crossing and smile with pride knowing that I have crossed them. In the meantime, I am not going to jeapordize my progress. Therefore, I do not step on the scale anymore.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Making Amends

   Amends aren't something to make once and then be forgotten. There will be amends that you will have to make for the rest of your life. Every time that you speak unkind words or do something to hurt someone, amends are in order. In constantly being aware of when amends have to be made and following through with making them, we have a daily reprieve contingent upon the maintenance of our spiritual condition.


   Recently, I had been working on amends to clear away the wreckage of my past. I have approached as many people whom I have harmed that I can remember, as long as when to do so wouldn't injure them, myself, or others. It has surely been a struggle, but for the most part, the results have been rewarding and well worth it. Some people though were not ready to accept my apologies, which was to be expected. People are not always willing to forgive and forget when you want them to. I know that my behavior, especially my drug and alcohol abuse, has affected more people than just myself. I have invoked worry, heartache, and pain in all those who loved and cared for me. But all that I can do is clean my side of the street. I can't control other people, but at least I can feel at peace with having cleared away my debris.


   Although I am nowhere near done when it comes to making amends. I am an imperfect creature and therefore make mistakes on a daily basis. We can't let our pride and ego get in the way of making amends. We all want things to go our way and we always want to be right. I continually find that I have to swallow my pride and deflate my ego when amends need to be made. No one is above having to "make right" their wrongs. In making amends on a daily basis, I have learned a lot about myself and about my character defects. I have recognised patterns in my behavior and been able to identify core problems.


   If we are meticulous and thorough about this aspect of our growth as a human being, then we will be filled with amazement and wonder. Our lives will change before our very eyes-- for the better! If we make amends when our heart tells us it's the right thing to do, we will feel so much more liberated. We will be trudging the road to happy destiny...

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Collide With Me

   I can't get you out of my head
   though I haven't even met you yet
   Destiny is calling me
   I'm treading water in your ocean
   Your tide sweeps over me
   Where are you, my mysterious horseman?
   I'm trudging through the trenches deep
   I want to feel your sunlight penetrate into my pores
   Possess me, consume me
   Collide with me
   Serenade me with your symphony
   Where have you been?
   Camouflaged in the canva of my life
   Do I deserve another half to complete my whole?
   I'm still human and flawed
   Let my fears wash away in the pool of my transgressions
   Take my hand, mysterious man
   Possess me, consume me
   Collide with me

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

I Seek Release

   Let the sweat pour down and wash over me
   In the deafening dawn
   I strive for a gentle reprieve
   My thoughts, in disarray, are seeping through the vaccum filter of my mind
   I cry out in dismay
   I'm seeking solace from my mental imprisonment
   Inklings of venom slither onto the embankment of my consciousness
   I'm testing and tearing at the seams of reality
   I'm ready to surrender to perceptions of serenity
   Let my frantic fanatics dissolve into the bitter sea
   A sweet symphony
   I yearn to break out of the confines of my confusion
   I've wept tears of acid rain
   I've knealt before Kwan Yin
   Absolve me from my sins
   I'm enmeshed in a sea of faces--
   My disturbed entanglement
   Is it possible?
   Could there be a release?

Monday, January 2, 2012

I've Won This Fight

   A little piece of me
   I's amazing to see
   how this beautiful boy
   emulates me


   Right from the start
   he captured my heart
   No matter how far away
   we will never be apart


   My love- a prism of light
   in the undulating sea of time
   I will never forget or lose sight
   of this precious love of mine


   His beauty is limitless
   He amazes and intrigues me
   Day in and day out
   he opens my eyes and shows me how to see


   I have him now
   I'm stepping out into the light
   No longer am I bruised and broken
   I'm holding on tight---
   I've won this fight...